Home > Events, Reflection, Writing > November’s Preserves

November’s Preserves

The spike in views was hardly unexpected, but in any case: the answer is forty-one, which, I suppose, is about correct.  

Euphoria is not what I have been feeling; this isn’t unthankfulness, but rather a statement of fact, or at least a statement of what passes for fact as far as I am attempting to be aware of my self. It is a clarification. (Heh.) I can’t say I felt disappointed either, and I attach the same qualifications as above. I could truthfully say that I was underwhelmed, if only because I acknowledged the possibility of being overwhelmed, but then again being underwhelmed might not be much different from being disappointed; I suppose if there is a difference, it lies in the fact that expectations can be managed to an extent where the probabilities appear clear, which leads to a situation where the most desirable but improbable outcomes are not cause for disappointment when they do not eventualize as much as they simply cease to exist as possibilities. Perhaps I am simply detaching the emotion from the awareness of a situation. (This may possibly be the first step in constructing an ironic situation.)

You see, it is easy to be dispassionate and analytical at the end of a day. (This may have something to do with that ‘hindsight’ thing.) In the course of it, things are messier and time passes quickly. It is only frozen at times like this, when I can pause, and the little cracks become visible, and clearer than flaws.

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Categories: Events, Reflection, Writing
  1. nicole
    9 January 2009 at 12:31 pm

    hey, congrats on your IB results (: all the best for army, and the years ahead!

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